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Twelve Cup Espresso Maker as performed by Leopard Zeppard
Well, one cup of coffee they say can be good for you —
If you're sluggish, it'll open up your glands!
But two cups of coffee are even better —
Just ignore the shaking in your hands...
chorus: I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
I got it to share coffee with my friends —
So I'll grind some food beans from Costa Rica
— It's organic, I hope that makes amends
But a mug is not a cup, philosophically, it's three.
And three cups are what I usually need.
Though four cups will really get me going —
Sometimes it takes a fifth or a sixth!
chorus.
Now on cold days and lonely mornings
It takes seven cups to even get me yawning —
Eight cups will barely open up my eyes
Ready to down a ninth!
After ten cups you're getting pretty wired —
You'd go back to bed but you're too tired to be tired,
and your stomach churns with existential misery...
But eleven cups dissolves all anxiety!
chorus: I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
I got it to share coffee with my friends —
So I'll grind some food beans from Costa Rica (Rica!)
It says it's organic ! I hope thats not pretend!
Well there's one more cup of coffee left in the pot,,,,
And I'd like to let it sit there and rot,,,,,
But if I drink it nowm or heat it up for later—
I'll drain dry my twelve cup espresso maker!
chorus: I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
But there's no more coffee to share with my friends —
But I got a statsh of mocha flavored Sumatra —
So I'll grind up another twelve cups again!
I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
There's so much coffee to share with my friends!
I'll grind some good beans imported from Java —
Call me same time, same place, tomorrow, again....
The End
by Andrew J. Williamson c2001/2016
Please contact Leopardzeppard@yahoo.com for permission to share {smile}
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Carol Anne (woke up today and she didn’t want to go to work)
By Andrew J. Williamson "Leopard" 2002/2007/2016
Carol Anne woke up today and she didn’t want to go to work
Serving coffee has become a drag,
And yesterday the boss was a jerk
Yes I know we all have days like that some days
But take it out on the punters not me
Because they don’t care what you think
Just as long as I’m there to make their drinks
In just my special way
Because altho’ I hate to say it I’ve got it all down for the regulars
Know the strength of their beverages ands their favorite flavors
I know what the size of their cup preferences and what they like for breakfast
How you doing? Here to Go? Time to make the sandwiches
Shuffle off and make the sandwiches
Because although it’s all getting very old very quickly
I’m not ready just yet for you to fire me
I can stand the grind and the waste of time to pay my rent,
make my art live life like it matters
So just give me a break and I’ll keep baking your cakes
serving subs with a smile
Grappling with the cling wrap
I’m just grappling with the cling wrap!
Because altho’ we all know the boss is a jerk some days
Here at your local coffee house there’s always a familiar face
With some sugar, a paper and a splash of half and half
And a little laugh about the absurdity of it all
It’s so absurd
It’s so absurd
Carol Anne called ill to day because she didn’t want to come to work
She’ll be in tomorrow and the rest of the week
Just as long as the boss stops being a jerk
I’m not listening I’m not listening I’m not listening I’m not listening
I’m not listening to you any more!
I’m not listening I’m not listening I’m not listening I’m not listening
I’m not listening to you any more!
I’m not listening I’m not listening I’m not listening..... Stop being a Jerk!
First released the album "Live in a Barn (with the doors wide open)" 2003
and again on "!Hurdy Yurty! (The Yurt Tapes) recorded 2002 released 2007
now another version on *kinda thingy* 2016
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Only O.K.
by Andrew J. Williamson (c) 2003/2016
I'm only OK so just quit asking
I woke up today on the wrong side of bed
I lay there awake starting up at the ceiling
wondering if it is real or is this just a feeling
Just leave me alone
Give me a second
I gotta have some space to think please
No you're not driving me crazy though it does amze me
You don't see that I wasn't thinking what you were thinking about
I'm only OK
so just quit asking
I woke up today on the wrong side of bed
I had one of those dreams I didn't know I was dreaming
Wondering what it all means or does it have any meaning
I guess you were close but no banana
It's hasta manana I'll call you tomorrow
Or see you next week when I don't want to shout
Or call you names
Cos I'm only OK
So just quit asking
I woke up today on the wrong side of bed
I lay there awake staring up at the ceiling
Wondering what it all means
To have so many feelings
No! I wasn't calling you names
I didn't say anything like that!
I know I do too but just now I didn't
You know I know you know me backwards
but you know I know you inside and out
At least I think you know I know cos right now I've this feeling
That I don't now if I know what any of this is about
And is it just a feeling?
Is it Just a feeling?
I'm only OK!
I'm only OK!
Just for today....
But I'll keep on smiling! (ooooh ooooh)
I'll keep on whistling and whiling the days away....
I'm only OK
so just quit asking
I woke up today on the wrong side of bed
I lay there awake staring up at the ceiling
wondering if it is real
and does the ceiling have feelings.....
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6. |
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7. |
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“Working this one out” by Andrew “Leopard” Williamson
I have no time for passing time, I have no time for doubt,
I have no time to read between the lines, or figure out what you’re talking about,
I have no time to change my mind, I have no time to shout,
Cos I’m thinking about the next life while I’m working this one out —
{Yes I’m thinking about the next life while I’m working this one out}
I’m not saying I believe in reincarnation, I wouldn’t be that bold,
In fact I’d say we don’t really know the first thing about our souls,
But I’m talking to people who’ve been long dead, and people who haven’t been bornyet,
And we’re talking about the next life while I’m working this one out,
Yes, thinking about the next life while I’m working this one out
We’re all caught in the conversation stage of enlightenment and it’s easy to say these things
We’re so damn clever, got all the words down in the right order,and we speak with such good technique
But if anyone’s listening do they know what we’re saying or are trapped by what we believe?
While we’re thinking about the next life while we’re working this one out
Yeah,thinking about the next life while we’re working this one out
But I figure if we figure out what we can do to do the best we can some how,
Then the next life, if it comes around, we’ll do even better than we are now,
So I won’t assume I know anything all ready and it’s always my turn to learn,
While I’m thinking about the next life while I’m working thius one out
Yes, thinking about the next life while I’m working this one out
So I’ll make some time for passing time, time to recognize the bond between us,
I’ll take this chanc to merge the lines and integrate head heart and penis
I’ll take this time to dissolve time and leave the doors open when I get out,
Cos I’m thinking about the next life while I’m working this one out
Yes I’m thinking about the next life while — I’m working this one
Yes, I’m working this one ,—Yeah, I’m working this one out
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8. |
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Quality Not Volume
by andrew j. williamson (c)2003/2016
This love is sold by quality not volume
Some settling and contentment may occur during the transit of our lives
Hurtling ever faster down the four lane
That stretches ever further out before our eyes
Don’t shake the package of our love upside down, there is no plastic toy
Or rip it up when breakfast’s done to find if you won the lottery
There isn’t any offers or the chance to spend and save
But my love it’ll never go soggy even if left swimming in milk for a day
My only desire is to offer complete consumer satisfaction
You can return to me any time for a complete guarantee
Call 1-800 mornings, office hours, or evening’s, it don’t matter
I’m open Mountain time, Pacific time, Central time and E.S.T.
This love is sold by quality not volume
Some settling and contentment may occur during the transit of our lives
Let’s hop a train or hang around a truck stop , baby
And hitch hike to a mountain in Tennessee
Where our love will be enriched by at least twelve vitamins and minerals
Absorbed from the sunlight and good organic greens
’Cos in our economy size cereal box shape garden
We’ll grow all our own leafs, fruits, roots, flowers, corn and beans
Yes in our economy size cereal box shape garden
We’ll grow all our own leafs, fruits, roots, flowers, corn and beans,
And have each other for breakfast….
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9. |
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Life in the Country
by Andrew j. Williamson c 2003/2016
Life in the country is very romantic
lets leave the city for a spell
we'll raise cows sheep goats and lamas
we'll make bread clothes and grow limas
we'll go to town drive round in a cart and mule
— and do home school
'Cos, it'll be a wonder when we're pumping water
from a well we dug ourselves with a rustic pump
And we won't pollute the oceans
no we'll never flush our night soil
we'll feed the earth when we take a dump
let's find a little fixer upper, catch a trout or two for supper
our skin will glow sufficient for ourselves
— and ignore the smell
Life in the country really is quite special
apart from all the little aches and pains
finish digging in the garden where there's no potatoes
turn around it's time to unblock the drains
and the pig's a super-pooper
and the compost pile's no hotter
and the chickens just stare at you for days
— and never lay
And the guests that came for summer grumble for a little peace and quiet
not to re-paint the barn on a green bean diet
But the barn is falling side ways and it needs a new foundation
so we're busy pilfering cinderblock from the nearby sub-division
that's putting up the taxes and causing light pollution
while George Bush on the radio declares his final solution
That cows won't come home to milk and the pigs not getter fatter
and the bank is breathing down my neck saying this is a serious matter
But I won't work for w@l - m*rt no matter what I do
No you won't find me wearing a smile of red white and blue
I'll be weaving willow baskets for market day next week
and hope to god I can afford the simple life I seek
cos life in the country it really is quiet chill
a little R 'n R in the front porch seat
after we've made cheese dipped candles chopped kraut and canned tomatoes
pulled weeds saved seed and pickled all the beet
we can make ends meet
and live our dreams
and soak our feet
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10. |
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Twelve Cup Espresso Maker as performed by Leopard Zeppard
Well, one cup of coffee they say can be good for you —
If you're sluggish, it'll open up your glands!
But two cups of coffee are even better —
Just ignore the shaking in your hands...
chorus: I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
I got it to share coffee with my friends —
So I'll grind some food beans from Costa Rica
— It's organic, I hope that makes amends
But a mug is not a cup, philosophically, it's three.
And three cups are what I usually need.
Though four cups will really get me going —
Sometimes it takes a fifth or a sixth!
chorus.
Now on cold days and lonely mornings
It takes seven cups to even get me yawning —
Eight cups will barely open up my eyes
Ready to down a ninth!
After ten cups you're getting pretty wired —
You'd go back to bed but you're too tired to be tired,
and your stomach churns with existential misery...
But eleven cups dissolves all anxiety!
chorus: I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
I got it to share coffee with my friends —
So I'll grind some food beans from Costa Rica (Rica!)
It says it's organic ! I hope thats not pretend!
Well there's one more cup of coffee left in the pot,,,,
And I'd like to let it sit there and rot,,,,,
But if I drink it nowm or heat it up for later—
I'll drain dry my twelve cup espresso maker!
chorus: I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
But there's no more coffee to share with my friends —
But I got a statsh of mocha flavored Sumatra —
So I'll grind up another twelve cups again!
I've got a twelve cup espresso maker!
There's so much coffee to share with my friends!
I'll grind some good beans imported from Java —
Call me same time, same place, tomorrow, again....
The End
by Andrew J. Williamson c2001/2012
Please contact Leopard for permission to share {smile}
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a collection of oddities recorded over many years as the opportunity arose. pages culled from a songwriting diary scrawled in a hurry while running haphazardly across the usa.
